Goodbye:
So, here it is, the
final day. What better way to end than on my son's 18th birthday. A
milestone for him and me too. He has become an adult and maybe one
day, I will become one too!!
It's been quite a "journey"
for me, a mixture of feelings and emotions. Fear mostly! Fear of
being judged or not saying the right thing, the usual craziness
inside my head.
I hope I have helped
a few people to understand what BPD is and how it affects the lives
of people like myself. How it cripples you, controls you and
becomes who you are.
I started to write
when I found out it was BPD awareness month. It was like my mind gave
me "permission" to do it. That's the only way I can
describe it. There was a purpose behind it, a valid reason if you
like. I was still scared of being judged but my need to tell people
about it, outweighed that. I hope that people will not be too quick
to judge other people who may be a little bit different. Who may not
fit in or have some kind of strange quirk or odd behaviour. No-one
knows their back story. No-one knows what they have been through and
indeed will never know unless you give them a bit of your time or
simply a kind word. Be aware of someone else's pain. HEAR WHAT
THEY'RE NOT SAYING!
Thank you to the
people that have read my posts and have liked or commented on them.
Especially the people I have mentioned before:
Heather
Johns, Rosina Bailey, Denise Drammis, Ian Johns,
Jeanette Hart, Mike Evans and Julie Nogales ( day 30) .
I have also had some kind words from a few family members that I am
not usually in touch with. Thank you to them too. Of course, my
children deserve the most thanks. For being there, seeing it first
hand, but loving me regardless. No doubt I will continue to struggle
with life but I will still try to fight on. I hope I will be brave
enough to comment on other people's posts sometimes or just say
hello. Maybe i will fade back into obscurity, who knows.........
